Wednesday, November 29

update - HNT

10.43 PM wednesday:
(hi, it's O)
T is on her way back to the hospital to see her son. She was awake for something like 36 hours straight and at the hospital for almost all of it, and only just grabbed 3 hours sleep. I've spoken to her probably every two hours or so. This is the first chance I've had to get reliable internet access and check with her about how much detail she wanted to share. I'm very sorry not to have posted more information immediately but I have not wanted to post the exact details without her express permission to do so.
She asked me to, and said I should do a list:

I mentioned that his internal injuries were (and are) severe. This is the list:

1. The most serious concern--the immediately life-threatening one-- when he went into surgery was the hemorrhaging from his lacerated liver. The doctors initially expected that it might not be savable, and this would have been very, very bad given how rare liver transplants are. But they successfully sutured his liver and stopped the bleeding.

2. The second concern, the other immediately life-threatening one, was the amount of blood he lost. He lost 4 units of blood internally. The human body only has 8, to give a perspective on this.

the blood loss came from a number of places internally. Here's the list:

3. his spleen. They thought he would lose that as well, but they were able to save it.

4. his kidneys are bruised and have blood in them, but fortunately are not lacerated.

5. His lungs are bruised and there are contusions on both; this is why he was expelling blood.

Other issues:

6. subluxation (sp?? I wrote this down while we were on the phone--)--
There is a shift in the way the discs in his neck lie along his spinal cord. This is why he's in the neck collar in the picture below, to keep him from moving and potentially causing damage to his spinal cord. Obviously this is a concern, but they haven't even had time to worry about or treat this, as it is not life-threatening. Immediately after the surgery they administered a paralytic drug to keep him from moving.

7. Almost every bone in his face is fractured, including his jaw. He has lost almost all his upper teeth, and everything in front. His lower lip is evulsed (sp?) which means split entirely down the middle.

8. They've administered a drug which is an amnesiac: i had no idea they could do that. He is heavily sedated--morphine--for pain. i know morphine sedation will also affect your memory in places, but apparently this is something seperate they give with the sole intent that when he wakes up he won't remember any of it or any of the pain he's been in.

The upshot is that even with all of this, he is incredibly, extravagently, phenomenally lucky.
T and her family went to the site of the accident, which is all marked off.

The distance between where his bike was and where he ultimately landed is sixty feet.

He was not wearing a helmet, and he was not wearing leather or any protective clothing.
He is extraordinarily lucky to have landed as he did, as awful as his injuries are.

He also has extensive "road burn": the lacerations and loss of skin that happen when skin meets asphalt. This is very painful in itself, and yet it's still the least of his injuries.

he is off the paralytic now and though he's not conscious per se he can hear and respond to people. He can move his fingers and toes when asked.
T tells me that when she tickles his feet and asks him to move them he won't--but when his sister holds his hand and tells him to squeeze it he does.
I told her this shows that on some level he's still well enough to ignore his mother, which proves he's still very much himself. It was very good to hear her laugh.

She has read all the comments everyone left and apart from when she first got the news, and when he was in surgery, it was the closest I've heard her to completely breaking down. She is intensely grateful to everyone for all their support and I know she will thank you all herself when she is able to. She is convinced an angel was watching out for him and that all your good thoughts have helped him too.

As T's friend and someone who loves her and her family very much, i am also very grateful for everyone who commented--or who didn't but kept this in your thoughts. Thank you, so much.


Visit the man Osbasso
Thanks to you all for your support!

Tuesday, November 28

thoughts for Tricia and family

Update: 10:38 AM
My brother said to me after his motorcycle accident that he would never ride again. He said that the problem with bikes is that if you hit anything -- you lose.
If anything or anyone hits you -- you lose.
With nothing to protect your body but a helmet and some leather you will always come out of every accident as the loser.

Last night my son lost.

O or I will update as we can. She is exhausted from staying up with me all night on the phone.

I thank you all for your kind words and well wishes.
They mean the world to us both.



hello, I'm Tricia's friend O and she asked me to post for her tonight. Her oldest son was in a bike accident tonight and is going into surgery now. Things aren't as bad as they could be, but they are quite serious.

I know he and T both would appreciate you keeping him in your thoughts at this time. Please leave a comment for him if you read this, I know T would like to show him everyone's good wishes (and she would appreciate the support too; as you can imagine she is very worried.)I know T has always been grateful to all her readers for their love and support, and feels blessed to have you as friends. This would mean a lot to her.

I'll update when and as I have more information. T asked me to put up a post but I don't know how much detail she wanted me to give. As soon as I speak to her again I will update.

thanks in advance,

Update 12:10 AM: It's much worse than they initially thought; his internal injuries are extensive.
T asks for your thoughts and prayers.

1.30 AM: Hooray!! He's out of surgery, they were able to stop the hemorrhaging. He did have a lot of blood loss, and there's still a lot of stuff going on but none of it as potentially severe as the internal stuff, and the surgery was successful though it they were not sure at first that it would be. Tricia will post the details, this was the info she asked me to post.

Thursday, November 23

Gathering HNT 2

What do you get when you gather a bunch of blogging girls, lots of apple martinis, jello shooters - and a can of reddy whip?

Jamie and I sharing like good Sexy Tomatoes should!
Margaritaville really does Rock!

I would tell you if I could remember.

Happy HNT!

See the man himself.

The SEXY TOMATOES are back and better than ever.
Come visit!

Sunday, November 19


Let me tell you this once
(I will not be able to say it again):
I have lost the meaning of words.
Heavy, they ripped
away from the sounds,
fell into cracked ground.

Naming~~ Nancy Mair

Lately it seems as if words have lost their meaning. Where once there was a wealth, seemingly endless, now there is a dearth. I feel emptied and exhausted.

I do wonder about the words we choose to use in our relationships. Words that have been uttered so many times that their meanings have lost any specific truth in our world. These words designed to hurt, we use again and again. Because they achieve a desired result. Their concrete meaning is no longer considered, they connect only to some Pavlovian reaction that has been learned over time.

And the words of love that used to penetrate? I long to feel their power again.
A wrenching power that could effect me in so many ways. Have I gone numb?
Have words lost their power over me. Have they lost their meaning?

Or am I lost?

Monday, November 6

Death and Beauty

The death of Jeff Buckley reads like a tragedy.
He was just at the start of an incredible career when he drowned in Memphis Tennessee in 1997. After leaving Orange County California and making his home in the East Village in New York he was just beginning to achieve International Renown when he died tragically.

He was 31 years old.

See Jeff Buckley speaking about his love of music in this video called GRACE.