woodnotwood
Sunday, February 05, 2006
A Waking Dream
I awoke in the night covered in perspiration. My heart was racing still from the dream. I was alone in the dream. I was panicked and running from something that was loud and destructive following just on my heels. There was nowhere to run, nothing but sea all about me. I stared into the nightmare waves as the sound of footfalls drew near and, raising myself on unsteady legs, I contemplated plunging into the sea or waiting for certain death that was fast approaching on the fleetest of feet.
I awoke with a start. My breath still held in my lungs and I reached to push the heavy blankets away.
Like one that on a lonesome road
Doth walk in fear and dread,
And having once turned round walks on,
And turns no more his head;
Because he knows a frightful fiend
Doth close behind him tread.
Rime of the Ancient Mariner~Samuel Taylor Coleridge
It was in this place of not-quite-awake-yet that I felt him there. Felt his body molded against mine. Felt his warm breath on my shoulder. The feeling was so real I immediately thought I must be dreaming still. I settled back under the covers and let my eyes close. My heart was still racing from the nightmare that had woken me.
I lay there, drowsing in and out, feeling secure in his arms, feeling his presence absolutely. I did not want to wake up. I did not want the feeling to leave me. I wanted to stay there just a little longer, to make the feeling stay as long as possible.
I wonder why he came to me last night? Did he realize that I needed him like never before? Did he just need to be with me? Was it me comforting him in my bed this morning or was it him comforting me? I cannot help but wonder if he felt me wrapped around him too?
And when did he leave?
He was there for quite some time, but when I finally awoke to the sound of music coming from my bedside alarm, I realized that he was no longer there.
The place where I had felt him was cold. The gooseflesh had risen on my arms and legs and I hunkered back under my blankets. I could still feel where he had been. Some residual sensation of long, tan fingers upon my thighs. I felt their strength, their raw, wanting maleness in the way they whispered caresses upon my body. The way they brought me to fevered release.
My mind is pushing the memory away, but the body cannot forget.
The heart cannot stop the desire.
*Scrabble Update:
Players in this game, and their final scores:-
Player 1 : T your final score is 266
Player 2 : K your final score is 287
Sorry T, but you lost by 21 points.
Yeah, I went out, but she beat me.
Not a bad score against a snobby Literature Professor at Radcliffe.
Of course she and I are playing while she is lecturing at Magdalen.
I think that means she has the advantage. It's morning for her while I am burning the midnight oil. And her view is much nicer.
PS. I told you I didn't have the Q!
The gauntlet has been thrown.
The next game is on.
You have scored a total of 32 points, for the word(s)
CLOAK (32)
Players in this game, and their current scores are:-
Player 1 : T your score is now 32
Player 2 : K your score is now 0
T, you are currently leading by 32 points.
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