Thursday, September 27

The Greatest Gift - HNT

This is me with my daughter Cheyenne.
The greatest gift I ever gave her was a lesson in how to do a proper breast self examination. It was a time of bonding for us both as we removed our bras and started our exploration.

I had thought at first that it might feel awkward. Like talking about sex for the first time. But I must say, I have an amazing daughter who was very reassuring and comforted me through the ordeal. I was a nervous wreck. ha!

We went through the process of nipple squeezing and feeling under our arms for lumps, then we did an exam on one another. I felt it extremely important that she be able to recognize the changes that occur with age. "This is how yours feel, this is how mine feel--they are both very different, but still normal". I didn't want this to be a traumatic experience (for either of us), I didn't want to make her worry unduly, but I did want to express the importance of self exams and finding lumps early on.

I must admit that she handled the whole thing with a level of maturity that I can only aspire to. She patted my head after we were done and I sent her to the shower to do the rest of her exam. My mother had told me when I was a teen that showers are the best place to do an exam. You take them every day and the soap makes your fingers nice and slippery so it's easier to feel for lumps. I think that must be so. Every woman I have ever known who had breast cancer found their lumps whilst showering.

I have to admit that on a scale of 1-10 for weird mother/daughter moments this would rank about a 15. But my daughter is my light and the love of my life, my crowning glory and the reason I look forward to getting out of bed every morning. My best friend. This is the greatest gift I've ever given her, but my motivation was purely selfish-- I want her with me. Always.

And now we're kicking off Boobiethon!
The beautiful Evening has created a support blog called
Beautiful, Beautiful Boobies.
Yes, yes. I admit it. I did put my boobies up there too. Ha!
But you'll have to go there yourself to see them. I'm not posting them here ;)

Here is a 'must read' on BSE.
Breast Self Exam
And a pictorial/tutorial showing the 5 Steps for a proper breast exam.

I'm working on the 'Going Pink for October' Blogger Templates as I try to get around to visit everyone tonight and tomorrow. Please be patient with me.
Here are some examples of how they're turning out.

There should be quite a few ready for download by October 1st with more coming as I make them.

You can watch my progress here... Breast Cancer Awareness.

As each template is being worked on it will be added to the sidebar as a link.
The templates will be in text format for easy copy/paste. And the instructions to add them to your blog will be on each site. Along with screenshots for those who are not familiar with or comfortable working on their own Blogger templates. And yes, I will be here to help if you need it.

If you'd like to help (wordpress please!), need help or have suggestions please email me.
yahoo: woodnotwood
And don't forget to send your photos to !

    A special thanks to Osbasso for his continuing support of this project, me (personally), and all of us who have boobies. You are the man!

    This post was featured by Viviane on !!!
    Thank you Viv.
    I love you.
    My boobies love you too ;)


    Evening said...

    You two look more like sisters than mother-daughter.
    I think you are a wonderful mother to teach your daughter this lesson. You may have very well saved her life some day. No one is immune from this disease.
    Thank you for all your support Tricia.
    I can't wait to get my new template.

    Blissfully Wed said...

    Beautiful shot.


    Tricia said...

    Evening, You know I adore you baby;)

    What can I say?
    I was a child bride you know. Of course it might just be the lighting... Ahem

    It's actually a slightly embarrassing topic to put up on a blog and I did weigh the consequences of the weird search hits that it's going to lead to. Ugh

    But my mom 'told' me what to do for an exam and I agonized through my teenaged years because my breasts were so lumpy and sore. I had no idea what 'normal' was so every swollen gland sent me into a panic. I just think that, as moms, we should all set protocol aside and make sure that our daughters are doing it right-- and that they feel comfortable coming to us if they get worried.

    This disease is just too dangerous and, as you pointed out, indiscriminate to take chances. Best to take matters into your own hands-- so to speak ;)

    Your new template is in the works my love. I want it to be as special to you as you are to me-- to all of us really. So it will be a mutual effort to catch your spirit and vivaciousness. I'll build, but you make the changes. Together we'll capture your unique lust for life.
    And I'll be honored that you let me be a part of it, and a part of your world.

    Cosima said...

    Both of you have that wonderful twinkle in your eyes, so very beautiful! And I agree, it's an important gift to give.

    Happy HNT!

    Tomscockwhore said...

    I agree with evening! You look like sisters!


    ~d said...

    What a wonderful lesson to teach your daughter! All the (little) unsaid things. The 'not being afraid to explore your own body'. The 'this is normal all women (should) do this'. My God! I am so impressed! You are a remarkable woman! I can only imagine the life lessons she must have picked up...just from watching you day to day!!

    Bud said...

    You're the best mom ever, Tricia. You're Supermom.

    Lapis Ruber said...

    If only more parents could talk to their children like that - the world would be a much happier place. Happy HNT

    Seamus said...

    It is too often done and too easy to assume that our kids will learn the really important stuff from "elsewhere". Yay for you, taking a pro-active approach. :) HHNT gorgeous!

    ~d said...

    I totally KNEW this was you...mainly b/c Tricia was (once upon a time) my FAVORITE girl's name. Then I had two boys! HAHAHA!
    But I love the ENERGY in your comment! it was like shooting a red Bull.
    And I wanted to say thank you!
    Not a Red Bull!
    a RED BULL


    tkkerouac said...

    Your daughter will never forget the lesson, great post
    Happy HNT!

    ~d said...

    My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.


    *I have to go pick up a BOY kid from school!
    THIS has been waay fun, Tricia! Nice to meet you! You and your (gf) Evening are supporting a wonderful cause here! At my place I have the clicky thing that you can click to (fund) mammograms. My small contribution.


    Tricia said...

    ~d I wonder if that bull knows he's red? My guess would be no ;)

    But it's not like he has to worry about discrimination or anything. I don't think the other bulls know he's red either.

    Guess what I'm drinking right now.

    No. No vodka in it. Yet.

    BTExpress said...

    It's great that you two can discuss things like that.

    Happy HNT!

    I checked out the link and may I say, you have beautiful boobies.

    Tricia said...

    Seamus, I've been thinking of you all day. I really miss your HNTs. I really miss when you'd come by and give me bufflesmooches and bufflegrunts-- and other bufflestuff. I can't wrap my mind around the thought of all that being over, and I can't wrap my heart around the idea of continuing the tradition without him either. I guess the question that remains is how we're going to continue on. I have no idea where to start honestly. i just know that we must.

    You know, doing this with Chey was all about the approach. My heart was in the right place I know. A place of openness and trust. And my intentions were noble as hell.

    But I knew there were only two ways this could go.

    1) She would love me all the more and think I'm the greatest mom, and friend, in the world.


    2) She'd end up in a 12 step program telling the world that her mom felt her up when she was a teenager.

    It's such a fine line between madness and genius ;)

    People in the Sun said...

    Oh, they don't want my boobies.

    That was great. She seems so mature about it all. Personally, my dad never even taught me how to shave. I'm still not sure I'm doing it right.

    Bunny said...

    You two are so beautiful!! You really could be sisters, not mom-daughter. Thanks for posting the BSE instructions! I do mine all the time and next month I get my first "smash and flash" (they smash 'em, then flash 'em with xrays). The joys of turning 40!


    Shibari said...

    Yes Yes.. you two are beautiful ... I love how happy you look in that pic... I really miss my stepdaughter.. we used to have moments like this...

    Tricia said...

    BT, thank you sweetheart, but I have to say... It's pretty damned boobilicious over there. I'm just glad it's not a competition ;)

    It really is a lovely sight though. Like a room full of artwork. It just takes your breath away.

    Tricia said...

    People in the Sun,
    I want your boobies.
    What do 'they' know anyway?

    I never really thought about the shaving thing. Wow. Okay, so it's not as bad as breast cancer, but hey, there are some really serious arteries in that area. And teenaged boys are so uncoordinated; They can't even get a glass out of the cupboard without almost trampling the dog to death and knocking over everything on the counter.

    Really. These people should not be allowed to handle razors without adult supervision. It's a matter of public safety.

    SeaRabbit said...

    I followed you in the blog theme for October... I am now pink too...;-)
    Great way to introduce your daughter to self-examination, I'm sure I will have the same nervousness as you when that time will come... as we have a little 40 years difference... ;-((
    Great photo of both of you!

    Moosekahl said...

    Even as a health care provider I'm not so good at the "routine" things. Wish I had had that lesson from my mom. I'm trying to make it a habit on my own. Happy HNT

    JD said...

    saw you on Reen's blog for the boobies. great pic. you have an interesting blog. will have to come back and read more. HHNT.

    Anonymous said...

    Breast cancer is a big problem in my mother's family and we have lost so many female members to it.

    I know that when I have children, I will have to try your innovative idea, because like you said, I want them with me forever.

    Thank you for being an inspiration :)

    Sharon said...

    Tricia, that was just me, leaving the anonymous message.

    Experiencing mouse problems.....

    AlwaysArousedGirl said...

    You are fuckin' fabulous. Kiss.

    ~d said...

    If someone (like) wanted to (snake) one of your special templates (you know) for October and such...
    like how would (said) person go about doing it?
    Hypothetically speaking and all.

    Tom Paine said...

    Brava to you for being so open and brave about this. I will forward this to C. to pass on to our daughters.

    Sara said...

    Thanks for taking the time to do this. It is extremely important. One day there will be an ultimate cure for all cancer.

    Tricia said...

    Sea rabbit! I can't wait to see you in pink! kisses and love!

    JD, welcome and glad you liked ;)

    AAG, you fucking rock baby.
    We have some catching up to do I think. Can't wait to talk to you.

    Tricia said...

    Sharon, trying to be all stealthy on me are ya?

    ~d, they're ready for snakin' now baby.

    Tom, like I said, it was an odd decision, but ultimately I think it worked out for the best. C should definitely do it this way. She's a woman who is forward thinking and this is just another way of teaching her girls that it's all about empowering themselves-- and knowledge is empowering beyond anything else.

    Tricia said...

    Sara, I do believe that's true.
    And sites like are going to help to get us to that cure. They're raising money and raising awareness. That's a beautiful thing!

    ~d said...

    Morning Tea

    I didn't feel right leaving this on the (above) post.